Monday, January 26, 2009


I have forgotten one of the most basic supermarket theorems:

This week Marmite is on Aisle 3, but next week Marmite will be on Aisle number
maxAisle - (exp(Aisle)-log(staff))/log(week). Other foodstuffs are moved as a attenuated function of the marmite function weighted by the weeks takings (after tax and benefits).

It's worth remembering. Each week I go to the supermarket and each week everything is somewhere else. Sometimes, staple foodstuffs are discontinued in favour of more exotic foods. For example:

Excuse me, where's the bread and milk this week?

They're discontinued this week. We are pushing nightingale's tongue puree and Kangaroo offal bread. Both are superfoods high in important profits for us.

It is worth stocking up on items you desire to hedge against they're becoming extinct at your supermarket. Then you can, as I have seen others often do, setup a little table outside the supermarket and allow fellow shoppers to buy the extinct items from you at index-linked prices.

Or, as a majority of people do, bring your refridgerator and stand outside the supermarket with the door open all day allowing people to buy fresh, frozen items from your refridgerator.

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